I’ve been doing a lot of sitting lately. Sitting and reading. Sitting and editing. Sitting and emailing. Sitting and reflecting. The winter months always seem to be so much more sedentary than the busyness of the summer. And while I enjoy the feeling of productivity and accomplishment that the busy season brings, there’s a lot I love about the calmness of these months. They’re full of anticipation and wonder. I spend my days reflecting on the past year while planning for the next. Dreaming of the type of life we’d like to have and what mountains need to be moved to get us there. It seems like the winter brings an aire of confidence, making us feel as though we can conquer the world with a new year of blank pages. Beginnings are so wonderful like that – a clean canvas to show the universe we are great.
And I like the feeling of working with my heart and my hands to plant and nurture and love what will grow in the spring + summer + fall. While I’m doing a lot of sitting, we still fall asleep early from exhaustion and wake early with the sun - excited for the day ahead while still lingering in bed for a few more minutes of warmth. It’s a feeling I love and that only seems to be made perfect in the winter.
Sometime in January, while sitting beneath the covers of a blanket, I spent a bit of time thinking about what it was I wanted for the year. And not just for the year, but for the future. I’ll admit that I’ve never been too excellent at picturing long-term goals. I max out around five years when I get stressed that bigger life things will eventually have to fill our days. But thinking about one year, or maybe even two or three, I can handle. A few reoccurring themes kept popping up into my head and when I finally put pen to paper I found myself with a nice little list of what I’d like this year to look like. I like to think it’s less about being better and more about being whole.
A few goal-items that may need clarifying...
>> Wear shorts in the summer : in so many words this is my way of saying ‘I want to work out and lose weight’. If you think I’m telling you how much weight I’d like to lose, you’re absolutely out of your mind. But let’s suffice to say that I don’t wear shorts. Ever. And this is the year I’d like to change that. I’d like 2013 to be the year I wear shorts in the summer.
>> Work hard + play hard (work well + play well) : here’s the thing, I work a lot. While Colton was gone I had no problem working until two or three in the morning. I actually love working late at night and find I’m much more productive than during the daytime. But because our world spins during the daytime, this isn’t realistic. When C got home I found myself lazily working here + there throughout the day and then getting stressed when he came home from work and I hadn’t finished a thing I needed to. This in turn leads to me working through the evening and into the night and sacrificing our own time together. I’d like to be better at working efficiently throughout the day so that my evenings are spent 100% work free. And email/instagram/facebook/computer free as well. This also means that when I'm done working for the night, I'm donedone. It's the plight of the small business owner to feel as though there's always work to be done bigger, better, and faster. But Colton has been so gracious in showing me that good, truly good, work requires good - and genuinely good - rest. I want my time behind the desk to be dedicated + efficient. And in my time of rest I want to be entirely present, sans guilt. No half-assing either part of the day.
>> Write more : I love writing, I really do, but rarely do I write without a purpose. This year I'd like to be intentional about writing simply because I love it. I’ve decided to take time twice a week to sit down and write – if for no other reason than because it clears my head and seems to make life lighter.